astrobstrd:

Will never see eye-to-eye with anyone less than the people who treat their pets like wandering ronin instead of valued family members. Like oh there goes Bronson our uncollared, chipless chocolate lab out of the permanently open back door again. If he comes home in three days after subsisting on garbage we’ll be mildly thrilled to see him again but if he succumbs to his natural predator, the 2006 Toyota Camry, that’s just the circle of life

anidealshape:

the r/curatedtumblr -> tumblr migration is so funny to me. it’s like going to the zoo and enjoying it so much you climb into the enclosure to live with the monkeys

vamprisms:

omg imagine being born and you are on a spaceship and everyone aboard is sooo so mad at you just because you burst out of some guy’s chest to be born. like um sorry i’ve not been alive before i didn’t even know that’s not allowed please be nice to me um the spaceship floor is cold is no one going to knit me some little booties i am calling child protective services


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